Silent Enemies
Perfectionism is my hunter. My stalker. My internal terror. Baiting me at every step to turn back and hide my shameful face. What will they think when you show your terrible ways? How they will ridicule and laugh at you when you dare chase your dreams. They’re going to see what you’re so blind to ~ your fatal flaw. The fact that some bold part of you thinks that you are capable of vast potential, realizing great dreams, that this is your birthright. Oh my god, how you fool yourself.
You must work harder, you must work as hard as you can everyday of your life to fix yourself. To fix what has always been broken. To fix the love that repels people from you. To fix what turns those you love into your greatest most daunting enemies. You must find what is ugly in you and hide it, burn it, destroy it. For this is what people see when you share your deepest creations. They don’t see the love and mystical magic you want to share. The unbridled joy of being free to be whoever you want to be.
This knowledge you possess, that you are ultimately unlimited ~ this is dangerous territory. This invitation to expand exponentially will break you apart. It will kill you and everyone around you. It is a threat to your existence. It is also your very nature. It is the core of who you are. Who you are is who you must be, yet who you are will destroy everything that you love. This is the bind you feel that you are in. This is the internal consequence of how you have been loved in a mistaken fashion. This is not true, but you don’t know it yet.
You only know that something is pulling you along. Some unbreakable rope has been thrown up around a star and it is tied to your heart. You cannot escape your destiny, nor would you ever choose to. Destiny ~ that which is created from your own void. An internal divine. Justice of your own making. Perfectionism is only the shadow of your great abandon. Go forth and set wild everything inside of you. If anyone laughs, you will not notice anymore.
The sound of your own beating heart and the blood pulsing ecstatically through your veins will drown them out.